Looking back at the Posts about Jennifer and Delilah, I can say that both gave me a great deal of pleasure. However, my time with Jennifer was purely about the physical being. She was bright, warm, and friendly, but nothing spiritual or intellectual happened between us.
Delilah, on the other hand, woke me up. I know that wasn’t her intention. It’s just that she said somethings that made sense to me at the right time that I needed to hear them.
For a long time, I have sat on some inheritance. It should have been put into a savings account or some other sensible place. I just didn’t feel right doing that. Sub-conciously, I knew there was something personal and potentially impractical that the money should be used for. At times, I thought it should be to startup a business. Other days, I thought I should dump the money into studio equipment, studio time, and models.
Instead, I have pissed away chunks of the funds on anime PVC collectibles and CG models for software. Impractical and serving no long term use to benefit me.
Delilah’s story woke me up to the fact that I have identified my life with my job. I am a good teacher. No doubts in my mind. Before my current job, I knew that I was more capable as a teacher. Now, I just have the same conversation several times a day. There just has to be more.
After I left Delilah’s, the idea struck me. I don’t need to live this way. I have the means to set my own schedule. I can find part-time work doing something interesting while working part time for my current job. Or I can go to part time at my current job and use the spare days to do whatever I want. It’s radical for me to even consider this. But it’s more detrimental to me if I don’t seriously consider this idea and act on it.
“You, your cells, your body, your core being is a manifestation of life, creation, purpose and death with grace.”
This quote resonates with me. If I do not attempt to live up to this quote, then I am just a waste of good air and good ideas. How can I let this happen?
