The following is a chapter-by-chapter review of Chris Hardwick’s The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life) [Amazon] [The Nerdist]

I really didn’t make plain the overall format of the book in my first review, and you are probably sensing a trend in the chapters so far. So let me clear things up. Chris Hardwick has divided The Nerdist Way into three parts: Mind, Body, and Time. We are still in the first part. It’s important to work through this first part and spend time with it. With coming to terms with the motivations, demotivations, and outright traps in the mind, the other two parts of the book are pretty much useless.

Chris (I’m going to switch to the first name mostly because I feel that he would want you to feel like the book is a personal conversation with him) uses this chapter to help help with one of the most crippling things the mind can do to a person: throw the body into a panic attack. The previous chapters have dealt with all of the issues that can contribute to a panic attack. Chris even outlined a lot of tools to help mitigate the onset of an attack. Still, sometimes the mind will sneak in a solid punch and try to drop you.

I have had only one panic attack I can recall in my life. It is truly harrowing. For no apparent reason, the mind grasps a hold of thought and starts to whip it around in your skull. The next thing you know, your brain is stirred up into a tempest. Shortly after that, rational thought is out the window. The heart is racing and breathing is quick and shallow. You are looking for exits and/or crawl spaces. The problem is that your legs feel useless. For some, this is a regular occurrence with very predictable triggers. I have a hard time imagining living with this kind of condition. The once was enough for me.

While he reiterates the fact that he is not a therapist, Chris understands this condition well. At it’s very heart are emotions born deep in human ancestry. While humans have crawled to the top of the food chain, parts of us still have not crawled out of the mouse hole. Humans no longer fear predators. That doesn’t mean that our minds won’t concoct one for us every now and then.

A part of Chris’ definition for a Nerdist is a person’s capacity for deep focus on a given subject. It is this attention to the minutiae that sets a Nerdist apart from many other people. The drawback he points out is that this deep focus must have something to focus on otherwise it will turn inward. At that point, things can go wrong. Suddenly, the dull ache in a joint becomes arthritis. Next thing you know, you are making a trip to the doctors and expecting to hear that you have some fatal degenerative bone disease.

Stop. Breath. Use that big brain and attention to detail to truly evaluate your current state. Then relax. Panic attacks, it seems to me, happen most to those people that are the least prepared. Sure they have thought of every possible conclusion for that splinter in their finger, but they haven’t weighed the odds on any of those conclusions. Every last one has equal value. Eventually, the balanced weight of possibilities starts you spinning until things go out of control.

It’s funny, but life works a little better when things are not in balance. There is very little difference between a life that is constantly spinning and one that is standing still. Neither of them seem to be going in any particular direction. With properly weighed options, a life will find a direction to travel.

Chris writes:

So find a thing! Learn it, like it, live it. Give yourself the gift of options. (pg.58 hardback ed.)

I like to quote Curly (Jack Palance from City Slickers [IMDb]:

Do you know what the secret of life is?…This (holds up one finger)…One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and the rest don’t mean shit.

Everything Chris lays out in the previous chapters is designed to help a person focus their attention on what’s really important, assign values to options available, and move forward. By honestly assessing the circumstances, our abilities, and the options available, it is possible to alleviate the effects of panic attacks, if not outright eliminate them.

The following is a chapter-by-chapter review of Chris Hardwick’s The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life) [Amazon] [The Nerdist]

First, I need to drag Hardwick and his publishers out on the carpet. The Nerdist Way includes several links to various and sundry resources. This is a good use of new media and insures that Hardwick can keep his materials timely. If properly used, he could even include errata. That said, the companion website for this book, nerdist.com, is not up! What? C’mon! Examples not pictured in the book are supposed to be at the site. Sigh. I am crest fallen. Yay, verily I despair. Wah.

Why is the above important to me? Well, Hardwick describes some charting techniques that I am not quite picturing in my head. I’d like to see those charts. And just to be thorough, I am following the examples. I have started my Character Tome and began to outline my image for the life I want. When references in the book come up, I want to be sure that my attempts check against them. Hardwick! (w/ Col. Klink fist pump)

The previous chapter focused on dealing with an inner voice that says, “Skip the salad. Go for the Twinkie. You’ll be happier.” It seeks to undermine your goals by making you happier now. Tonight’s chapter focuses on the inner voice that seeks to undermine your goals by making you feel like those goals are out of your grasp and will always be. It poisons the apple.

Laziness, apathy, and quick rewards are pretty easy to correct compared to this inner voice. It’s like having Joan Crawford in your skull (youngsters, go look her up [Wikipedia]). We will beat ourselves up with unwarranted judgements and outlandish prophecies. Self-doubt is truly the most difficult monster a hero can face.

Hardwick provides several techniques for negotiating with, if not just outright silencing, that voice. Most useful is probably just writing out the undermining comments the inner voice says. It gives a chance to see concretely those statements that you are making about yourself. Better yet, you get to weig their value. See just how ridiculously hard on yourself that you are.

Once, the boogeyman at the back of your mind is thrown out into the light, it becomes shrinkingly small and easier than a rust monster to beat.

The following is a chapter-by-chapter review of Chris Hardwick’s The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life) [Amazon] [The Nerdist]

The more I think about last night’s chapter, the more the idea is appealing to me to do something with it. Self-help books really aren’t my thing. So far though, Chris’ thinking matches some of my own. So, this weekend I am going to begin my own Character Tome. (My character name is still up for debate. Maybe Theodin?) I’ll add separate posts to track progress.

Tonight’s chapter is probably the most difficult one so far. It’s about defeating an enemy. It’s probably safe to say the whole book from this point is about defeating an enemy. It’s not apathy or forces beyond our ken. The enemy sleeps with us and stares us down every morning. This enemy is always with us. You got it. The enemy is us.

Facing this yellow bastard down is nothing but toil, but the rewards make legends. Hardwick doesn’t put the terms in quite so deep purple prose, but those are the stakes I think. Let’s face it, nothing worthwhile comes easy. Learning is struggle. Refining skills is struggle. Getting those skills in front of other people is struggle. Human’s live lives avoiding as much struggle as possible. We fall into patterns that are comfortable to us. Struggle is the opposite of comfort.

The reason we seek comfort is that comfort feels good now. We forget what accomplishment feels like. We forget that there are greater joys than comfort. Working for them is the only way to attain joy in accomplishment. But then again, TV and a bowl of chips is pretty good, too.

No. No. Off. Bad dog!

See what happens when we face big goals. We retreat into what’s comfortable now. To keep us there, the brain fills our heads with doubt and irrationalities.

Hardwick has some suggestions to help redirect the doubt and crack the irrationalities. I won’t spoil that for you. This chapter also begins to flesh out the form that the rest of the book will follow. Each section in this chapter is capped by a Characterize block. These blocks have suggested questions that you the reader should reflect on. Write them down in your Character Tome. See the weight of the responses on paper. Do the doubts and irrationalities make sense?

In the end, we get in our own way more than any outside force. Ironically, the one element we can claim to control is our minds.

Before I jump into the next chapter, I want to take a moment to clarify the last thing I was trying to say in my previous post. [link]

Hardwick writes:

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve skipped dinner because I’m sitting in my driveway going “What sounds good??” for an hour until I give up and go to bed hungry and confused. Know what you’re specifically going after. (pg.7 hardback ed.)

The last line is good advice most of the time, but the example shows a person that is paralyzed by an inability to make a decision and set out. More importantly, that person is paralyzed to their own detriment. If you’re hungry, but you don’t know what to eat, then you should still go out for food. If you’re unhappy in your current job, but don’t know what job you’d like to do next, then start looking for a new job. If you are lonely, but don’t know what kind of person you want to date, then by all means go out dating.

Curling up because you don’t have all the answers is the worst reason to not do something. The act of doing is part of the learning process. You may discover a new restaurant, the dream job, or the love of your life. Better yet, you may discover all of the restaurants, jobs, and people that you would never want. You have successfully narrowed your options. Moreover, those options are now excluded because you know why they are not a fit for you. Ultimately, you have changed a situation that you are dissatisfied with and began directing your life. Even if the direction seems meandering it still is away from the place your were unhappy.

Okay, now for chapter 2.

I enjoyed this chapter. It took me back to the days when Danny Jones and I would roll characters and prepare for campaigns. Ah, the Keep on the Borderlands. It had never occurred to me that those character sheets might have a pertinence to my own life. I felt silly reading this chapter, but I admit that the ideas presented were eye-crooking fascinating.

Hardwick presents his own form of self-assessment test. Not really a test, but a profiling tool. While it was odd to think about character stats and alignments again, it also made sense. I created characters for D&D that I wanted to be. Now I also wonder if I created characters that were magnifications of me. Where I might not have been the most athletic kid, my characters could brawl with bugbears and wield clamours like fencing foils. A character sheet based on me allows me to evaluate my perceived strengths and weaknesses.

Gamifying complex or difficult tasks isn’t a new idea, but Hardwick’s approach is unique I think. He has created several tools to aid readers in the creation of a character sheet. There are templates for character sheets. Even name generators. What better way to motivate than creating a name to aspire to. Can I go from humble Ted to Tedinor, the High Wizard of the Emerald City? (Okay, Tedinor isn’t my chosen name, but the title does have gravitas. I’ll probably keep that.)

Gamers are an excellent example of problem solver. An unhappy life is a very complex problem to be solved. Gamers will attempt and fail at tasks several times. Each failure is answered with a new iteration of a solution. Once the solution succeeds, then a gamer will happily move on to the next problem. Jane McGonigal [TED Talks] gives an excellent talk on the lessons learned about problem solving from gamers.

With a character sheet, I can chart my progress, see areas for improvement, and eventually become the character that I imagine myself to be. Now where’s my d20?

Before I dive into reviewing this just released book, let me provide my parameters and history. I’m a Nerd. An Art Nerd specifically. I watch my fair share of Sci-Fi, Fantasy, and Anime. I play table top RPGs with friends. And a friend and I write apps for fun and profit. My day job is repairing computer hardware. At the end of the day though, I am an Art Nerd. Even have a Masters degree in it (hence, the day job.)

My Relationship to Chris Hardwick is well… non-existent. I am a fan and long-time listener to The Nerdist Podcast [iTunes]. You can learn more about him at the Nerdist Industries website [link]. What I have learned is that he is a sincere man that has turned his life around.

The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (in real life) [Amazon]is his contribution to the self-help shelf of your bookstore. It is his take on how a person can take command of his or her life using the skill set honed by years or rolling d20, collecting stamps, reading the extended Star Wars cannon, learning to play violin, or drawing a perfectly shaded sphere. His approach appeals to me.

My goal is to read a chapter each night and review it. I want to avoid a blow by blow comment on the chapters. Instead, I will respond to the chapter contents and maybe even add my two-cents to the discussion. In the end, I hope to preserve the details for others to enjoy. The book also has a personal interest for me. For the last several years I have struggled to put my own life on a better course. I’m hoping to find some useful advice and affirmation in these pages.

On to the review…

I Have Lazer Brains – Pew-pew!

The introduction is a tone setter. It took me a little bit to get use to Hardwick’s writing. He’s a comic by trade and it show’s in his writing. It’s very conversational and personal, but it feels like it’s written for beats. That said, Hardwick lays out the terms for the material he will deliver throughout the rest of the book. Knowing the direction is important to any project.

Part 1 – Chapter 1 – You Own Your Own Mind: Hardwick lays out a clear definition of Nerd. More importantly, he gives justification for owning that title. As a kid, I spent more time with my Legos than other kids. Exploring the countryside was more about finding something than getting away from something else. I spent hours pouring through the Knowledge Tree encyclopedias. Drawing and writing were my favorite tasks. The hallmark of a Nerd is intense focus.

Hardwick touches briefly on what a derailed life looks like. It’s basically a life spent focused on tasks that feel like they have rewards, but ultimately there is nothing to show for the efforts. Essentially, the disillusionment of lost dreams or lives side-tracked takes the form of a person watching TV until their ass turns numb. All that’s leftover is a trivia machine.

The point to be learned here is that the tools learned in childhood are still useful for putting a life on course and making the happiness we want. He does bring up a point that I don’t fully agree with. It’s more that he uses an analogy that I don’t fully agree with. He describes sitting in the car, hungry, and unable to decide what he wants to eat. Eventually, Hardwick gives up and goes back inside. Basically, he saying, “If you don’t know where you’re going, how are you going to get there?”

Hardwick is also describing the terror of making a decision. The terror comes from either having too many choices or none at all. It’s debilitating. I don’t disagree with him here. But he did miss a detail. Knowing a state of being needs to be changed is enough to begin the process regardless if all the details are decided. The alternative to sitting at home hungry is going somewhere for food. Just because you don’t know your exact destination doesn’t mean that you should just accept not moving. If you are hungry go find food. If you are unhappy, go find happiness. Go find satisfaction. Go find purpose. It’s better to be seeking without a specific target that not to be seeking at all.

Tomorrow: RPG Your Life